I'm a freshman in high school. Rough, I know. I use to think it was crazy for girls to not want to eat food! It's insane. I mean, I come from a spanish family, and that means that food is my best friend. Nothing beats a home cooked feast, like grandma's on christmas eve. But ever since the beginning of this school year, I've been feeling seriously self conscious lately about my weight. A lot of people tell me I'm skinny, but I hate the way my body looks. It drives me insane seeing these beautiful, skinny girls running around on tv. Most people would argue that, being that skinny is bad for you. But I can't help it. I'm being sucked in. It's a mental issue for me now. All I can think about is my weight. I'll be sitting in my first period class, negotiating what I'm going to have for lunch. I feel guilty whenever I eat something. But I also feel guilty throwing it back up. So my solution? STARVATION. I know it's wrong. But I don't want to do it.
Imagine yourself being locked up by zigsaw in a room full of food. The walls are all fun house mirrors making yourself look 10x fatter than you truely are. And you? your limbs are stappled to a chair in the center of the room. You have an empty stomach and all you want is to eat that big mac in front of you. The consiquence for eating it? you die. It's all a mind game. And that's exactly how I feel day to day. People think anorexia is a fashion statement for losers low on self esteem who just want to look like the movie stars. It's NOT something to make fun of. Because once you start, there's no getting out. No matter how badly you want to make yourself believe that if you eat, you'll feel better. It's not that easy to quit. I constantly hear girls making cracks about it. But they'll never know until they've been through it.
ANOREXIA IS A DISEASE.
I never hear people making jokes about cancer victims.
